Dan continued to live with my parents and I was in Texas with my husband and son. On April 17, 1991, our daughter, Stacy Marie was born. My parents and Dan took a road trip to Texas. They didn't come right down because one of my parents had a stupid high school reunion in Nebraska at the time Stacy was born that they deemed more important, but since this is about Dan, I'll leave out my editorial comments regarding that and save it for another blog. They came down when Stacy was about 3 months old. This time we were living in a house, so mom, dad and Dan stayed in the house with us. Dan stayed in what was later to become Stacy's room (and the room he would stay in years later when he came to live with us). Dan didn't pull any 'stunts' like the one I described in my last blog about him. In fact, the visit was uneventful, except that I had the feeling that would be my parents' last visit to Texas. It was. After that, they deemed themselves too old to travel, even for high school reunions.
Dan continued living with them at home and doing lots of stuff for them around the house. In fact, he was a tremendous help to them. When we would travel up to Ohio to visit them, we stayed with my mother-in-law, who had plenty of space in her condo. We would go and visit them and would come to Ohio around Dan's birthday. That way we could celebrate Dan's birthday on June 29th and Steve's grandma's birthday on July 5th. Steve would always take Dan to the store of his choice and let him get a few CD's as a birthday present. Well Dan really liked 'Circuit City.' I don't know why, Dan takes a liking to something or someone and there's no logical reason. So, Steve would take Dan to 'Circuit City' for his birthday. We would always go out to dinner at Bob Evans for his birthday because that's where Dan wanted to go. He could order whatever he wanted and I remember him one time, ordering a HUGE pile of mashed potatoes. Then, they had presented him with a large birthday cake of which he had a HUGE piece. I wondered how he could put that much food away in one sitting. My husband wondered the same thing.
Dan also liked their neighbor, Mr. Huckins. He looked up to him. They had a charcoal grill that Dan liked and he would love to watch them cook stuff on it. Sometimes, my dad would have Dan spreading wood chips on the gardens around the house and Dan would use that as a perfect opportunity to watch the neighbors have barbecues, so my mom would have to make sure to keep an eye on him and make sure he wasn't too nosy. Dan made up tales of Echo putting out wood chips for dad in the garden while spying on the neighbor's barbecue, accidentally knocking a burger off their grill onto the ground when they weren't looking and hiding the burger in dad's bag of wood chips, then later on, dad would find a mystery burger in with the wood chips. For someone who's mentally retarded, Dan has quite an imagination. Dan still talks about the time we were making his birthday cake and discovered we had no eggs and had to go next door and borrow a couple of eggs from Mrs. Huckins. These people were always really, really nice to Dan and to my parents and I. It was a red-letter day for Dan, we were using the mixer to make his birthday cake and paid a visit to the Huckins family. He can remember the date on which this happened. Dan will remind us that it wasn't the old Sunbeam mixer he liked as a child, they had to get rid of it because the brushes in the motor went bad, that it was a new mixer that mom and dad got, that was used to make his birthday cake..
For the past thirty years or so, Dan has loved barbecues. My dad got a grill from Sears, in fact it's the same grill we have now. I think they got it because Dan likes barbecues so much because they didn't have one when we were kids and Dan wasn't interested in them back then. Sometime after we moved to Texas, Dan got his interest in barbecues. He doesn't care how the burgers are cooked, or how they taste, just that they are cooked on the grill. Dan loved it when he came to live with us in 2002 because we still had our old grill and we kept dad and mom's grill so, for a while, we had two grills. Dan thought that was really cool. We had to get rid of our old grill because it was rusty but as I said earlier, we still have dad and mom's grill.
Dan loved it the time they were visiting us in Texas when we were living in the apartment on Boca Agua in Fort Worth and we bought a grill and had a cookout on the balcony. He can remember the date we got the grill. He can remember the date on which dad got their grill in Ohio. Whenever mom, dad and Dan came to visit, we always had a barbecue for Dan and when we visited mom, dad and Dan, we had a barbecue for Dan. He still loves barbecues to this very day. The nice part is that he likes cleaning the grill and has happily always been the one to clean the grill. That's perfectly fine with us as long as he waits until it's cooled off and doesn't do it in the heat of the afternoon.
Dan also had a fascination with basement crawl spaces. We had a crawl space in the basement of our old house in Columbus and we had one in the basement of our house in Gahanna. Here in Texas, basements are as rare as a cool day in July, so we don't have either a basement or a crawl space. My dad kept a wooden cover over the opening to the crawl space in the basement of our Columbus house. Dan loved it when dad took the cover off and Dan would get to look inside. All we had was a bunch of junk in there, but Dan was fascinated. He also had a fascination with attics. When Dan was little, he was always talking about what the attic was like in that house, although we never went up to it. He also loved me telling him about Grandma and Grandpa Briggs' house in Lincoln, Nebraska that had an attic fan and when you turned on the fan, a light would come on in the attic and you could see into the attic. In our Gahanna house, there were two attics because it was a split-level house. The door to one of the attics was in Dan's closet. Dan would take the cover off and look into the attic at the duct pipes, wiring and stuff. One day, Dan left the cover off and one of our cats, Tiger, got into the attic and wouldn't come out. Mom and I got really upset. I think dad was out of town at the time. Somehow, we got Tiger out of there, I don't know how, probably, we lured him out with dried beef. Dan got in big trouble for leaving that door off and didn't take that door off again. When mom got upset with Dan, dad said she "bulled" at him. I have drawn many cartoons of mom as a bull going after Dan, dressed as a matador.
Before we moved into our house in Gahanna, dad had a builder put a small screen door with a latch over the crawl space in the basement, so we could get in there easily and it wouldn't get too damp in there and our cats couldn't get in there. Dan loved to look in there when he came downstairs to help mom with the laundry. My parents kept their Christmas stuff in there. When I lived at home, Dan loved it at Christmas time when I would go into the crawl space to get the Christmas stuff out. Dan would always be there to help me get the Christmas stuff out. Before we moved out of that house, I let Dan go a little ways into the crawl space to take a look at it. Dan didn't know how to back out of there, so I talked him down.
Dan also had a fascination with electricity that got dangerous. When my parents, Dan and I first moved into the house in Gahanna, one of the electrical outlets shot out a few sparks for no reason. Dan thought that was cool. Dad had an electrician out to fix the problem. Dan started making up stories about Echo taking half of an extension cord, plugging one end into an outlet and sticking the end with the wires sticking out into the other end of the outlet and making sparks fly. He called it "powing plugs." What got scary was when he cut an extension cord in two and actually started "powing plugs." It would knock out the circuit, but Dan knew how to re-set the circuit breaker. He also knew what was on each circuit, so he wouldn't make the lights go out in whatever room my parents were in. Steve and I discovered this when we were visiting them one summer. Steve gave Dan a VERY stern talking-to. He told Dan how that could start fires in the wall and how he could really hurt himself. He made Dan promise to NEVER do that again. Dan promised and we threw out the cut extension cord. We never told my parents. As to my knowledge, Dan has never done that again.
Dan also had a fascination with air ducts. I don't know why, but he did. Some of the air ducts in our Gahanna house consisted of sheets of metal nailed to the beams in the basement. Dan got fascinated by these sheets of metal. He started making up stories about Echo bending back the sheets of metal so she could see into the air duct. Then Dan started bending back the sheets of metal. Dan knew that he would be in big trouble if mom and dad found out. I don't remember the details, but it got fixed and Dan didn't do that again. I don't think they found out that it was Dan who messed with the sheet metal. I was careful about what was put into Dan's bad stuff stories. If Dan got any wild ideas about Echo, I quickly discouraged them or changed them to something that was just basic slap-stick stuff.
When Dan was real little and we lived in the house in Columbus, we had cold air vents on the floor in the hallway in front of his room. Dan would drop small toys into the cold air vent and since the bottom of the duct was right there, they just sat there, but Dan thought it was funny. Dad would remove the grill on a regular basis and clean out the cold air vent. Dan got a kick out of that too. When we lived in Gahanna, Dan figured out if you dropped something down the cold air duct upstairs, that someone in the family room could see it pass through the cold air vent on the way down to the basement. Dan made up all kinds of stories about Echo doing that while mom was having company and the guests seeing stuff like paper towels fluttering down past the cold air vent in the family room. When we found out about his interest in that, we discouraged him from dropping things down the air ducts.
When Dan lived at home with mom and dad, mom used to take Dan on regular visits to the library to encourage Dan to read and keep his mind occupied. I think that was a great idea, but I don't have time to take Dan to and from the library, so for Christmas and birthdays, I get Dan books from Half-Price Books. Dan prefers books about household appliances and books about the human body. He doesn't care for novels. He used to love comic books, but ones he liked included were ones for little kids like Little LuLu, Archie and Dennis The Menace. He doesn't understand the super hero stuff. He also likes 'Calvin and Hobbes.' I have to be careful what kind of cartoon books I get for him because some of the more recent cartoon stuff has humor that he doesn't understand. I also have to be careful what greeting cards to get him because a lot of the humor in greeting cards these days, he doesn't understand. If he saw some of them, he would just look at them blankly and say, "Yes."
To this very day, I have absolutely NO idea what sparks an interest in him. I probably will never know.
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Leap Blog
Saturday, March 23, 2012 - Today, I'm taking a break from my series about my brother, Dan, to talk about big electronic leaps. My husband has always been the one to take a big leap. I'm talking about getting new and improved electronic devices. I have always been the timid one, not wanting to chance it, wanting to be cautious. I remember when we were first married, the only TV's we had were Steve's little black and white TV, which had like a 12" screen and my grandmother's old black and white TV which was bigger and sat on a serving cart in our living room. Color TV had been available for years, but we just couldn't afford one up to this point and our parents had given us these TV's; we were happy to have them. We had been married several months and both had full-time jobs but they were entry-level jobs and the pay was also entry-level. Having just come from Ohio where jobs were scarce, we were happy and thankful to have our jobs. Steve at Radio Shack and I was at Tandy. A friend at work had told Steve about this special deal on a color TV at a place in Fort Worth called 'Rave.' We had never heard of the brand before, it was 'Samsung.' It's a well-known brand now, but not back in 1983. Steve told me about it after work. Of course, cautious me, I wasn't sure. I wanted to make sure we could afford it, but after lengthy discussion, we decided we could. We went down to Rave, bought it and brought it home. It was our first big purchase as a married couple. Steve was so happy he gave me a big hug. We finally had a color TV! Steve was the one who wanted to take the leap. I had been content to continue on as we had, but he took the initiative to take the big leap and it was a really good one. That TV lasted for years and years. It's been sitting in our garage for some time now because the alignment in the colors on the picture was slightly off, but the last time we ran it, it worked fine. We wouldn't be able to run it today without a converter unless we hooked it up to satellite because some dodo out there wanted to make everything digital and do away with analog signals.
Steve also took the big leap when we got our first VCR. It was a great big unit, with a lid that popped-up on the top. It had a remote with a wire on it. It was state-of-the-art for the time. It was great. We could now rent movies and watch them. We just had to remember to rewind. The best part was that we could record shows and watch them at our leisure. I let Steve do the programming. I remember Steve programming the VCR to record 'The Paper Chase.' We still have those tapes. I ran one when we got the VCR we have now and the quality seemed fuzzy, but for the time, it was great.
I remember when I was pregnant with Stacy, Steve wanted to take another electronic leap and get a CD player that played 5 CD's at one time. I wasn't sure, of course I was worried about the expense with the up-coming baby and we had a CD player that played one CD at a time. Steve said that one didn't sound right; it sounded too crisp. I still was the cautious one. He had gotten it, but had packed it up to take it back to the store because I was so hesitant. I told him that we should keep it. Boy am I ever glad we kept it. It sounded great! We could play a whole bunch of CD's on it. We got a lot of enjoyment out of it. I don't know why I am so cautious, maybe it's a part of my mom that's in me. Maybe it's the OCD part of me that rejects change, I just can't figure it out.
The same thing happened with the TV we had in our living room in the house in Arlington, I was the hesitant one, but Steve was the one who wanted to take the leap and get it. It turned out to be a really good deal and gave us years of enjoyment. It was a wonderful TV.
I've also stubbornly held on to cell phones until they were considered archaic. I held onto the last phone I had for a long time, even though I had to hold it shut with a rubber band. I had one for years that had an antenna, long after it was probably a museum piece. When my phone was being held together with a rubber band, Steve finally took me into Verizon and helped me pick out another phone. I was going to go with one model and he encouraged me to get the next step up and I'm glad he did, I'm a lot happier with the phone he suggested I get.
Also, as years have passed by and electronics got more complicated to operate, I have been afraid to learn the operations of new electronic stuff. I still don't know how to watch a recorded show on the TV upstairs. It's Jeff's TV, he bought it. We got HD upstairs and had to give up our TiVo up there. The HD receiver looks really cool with its bright blue display, but I don't have a clue how to run it or which remote to use. Jeff taught me how to turn off the TV one night because he didn't feel like getting up out of the chair and I was right by the TV. I'm glad he didn't feel like getting out of the chair, at least I know how to turn it off and on. I do know how to watch a movie in HD on the Xbox because Steve and the kids taught me how and I wrote the instructions down and keep them in the box with my favorite HD movie, Planet Earth. I don't get stuff like that easily, I get steps mixed-up or press wrong buttons and get things really screwed-up. I never knew how to program a VCR either, but I know how to copy a video tape to DVD on our new VCR because Steve taught me. If it weren't for Steve, the clocks on our VCR and DVD players would have had blinking 00:00's on the display.
There's been another big leap in the works. Steve's had been wanting to get one of those flat screen TV's for the bedroom. Of course, true to form, I have been the hesitant, cautious one. He also wants to get HD on our satellite service for the bedroom and that means we'd lose the TiVo. Now I LOVE the TiVo in the bedroom. It's an older TiVo and it's so EASY. The way it's laid out, I learned how operate it easily and operate it every day. It's so easy for me to record a show and then watch it when I want to. So, needless to say, I am the hesitant one, more than that, I've been downright stubborn when it comes to my TiVo. It means I'd have to learn a new DVR and it wouldn't be a TiVo because the new TiVo's are way too pricey. There is also a remote that does everything and I wouldn't have to think about it, but that sucker costs $60.which seems way too expensive. I tend to get scared about learning new electronic stuff because it takes me a long time to learn it and it's hard to learn. I get the steps mixed-up or leave out a step and things get so messed-up that I have to get my husband or kids to restart everything. The funny thing is that I'm pretty good about learning stuff on the computer. I've been learning the latest versions of Photoshop, InDesign and Illustrator and am having fun doing so.
As far as getting HD on our downstairs TV,.I'm also not real thrilled about everything getting uprooted so they can run a wire through the wall. I wish this whole operation could be done wirelessly. I wish getting HD was as easy as setting the 'Sharpen' filter on Photoshop. Still, being able to see a nature show about ocean life in HD just might make the whole running a wire, getting HD and learning a new DVR thingamabob, worth it.
The TV picture is supposed to be clearer with HD. I've never really paid much attention to the difference. It has all looked pretty much the same to me, HD, regular D, stuff like that. I mean like HD is a little clearer, it's like getting new glasses or like using the 'Sharpen' filter in Photoshop and the colors seem a little brighter, but that's about it. It also might help if I would clean my glasses now and then, maybe that would help make the picture a little clearer too. Sometimes, something on TV will look real clear to me and I'll ask if that's HD and they'll say it's not and that will surprise me. The kids and I watched Jeff's Babylon 5 DVD's on his TV upstairs and that looked really great to me, but they said it wasn't HD. It sure looked like it to me, but apparently it wasn't. Maybe my glasses were clean then. The only time I've ever really seen much of a difference in the TV picture was when I watched my favorite video, 'Planet Earth.' Some of those scenes are really magnificent. Anyway, I'm happy to have the service we have downstairs because I can operate the TiVo, record what I want, when I want and watch what I want when I want, without having to ask someone to set it up for me. Still, a nature show as clear as 'Planet Earth' sounds pretty cool and would be worth running the wire and learning the new DVR thingamabob.
I wish I was as smart as my kids are with stuff like that. Both of them easily picked up running the system upstairs and that includes the video games. Stacy picked up how to do Netflix on the new TV instantly I really hope my reluctance with new electronics is not an 'old' thing. Believe it or not, my kids consider me 'old.' I don't. Anyhow, I got frustrated with my mom because she would have nothing to do with computers. One time, when I got to her house, the cable on her TV was all screwed up and the picture was really grainy like the signal wasn't coming in very well. It had been like that for some time and she was paying for cable and getting crap and she didn't even realize it. One phone call by me to the cable company fixed it. I hope I'm not getting like her. Still, I can't imagine her playing 'Angry Birds' or adjusting photos in Photoshop.
Anyway, Steve said he was going to research them and shop around. I told him that was fine and to take his time. I told him to pick out whatever he wanted because I trust him. He knows what he's doing and I don't know that much about flat TV's. I also knew he would get the best deal. He's real good at shopping around for the best deal. Every once in a while, I'd get an e-mail from him with a link to another TV. They all looked very nice. He would show me TV's when he was on the computer in the evening. I really wasn't in a hurry, and he's so good and thorough when shopping for something. I figured that I still had a little time with our old system.
Today, he took another big electronic leap. When I got home from work, it was like any other day. I walked into the bedroom and my jaw dropped! I said "HOLY S*#t! There, on top of the dresser was a flat TV. Not only that, but it's a 3-d flat screen TV and they bought a Blu-Ray player. He got a good deal too, I knew he would.
So now, it's time for another leap, I'm talking about the one to get HD on the satellite downstairs. My husband would really like to get it and said we won't be getting the best from the TV unless we get it. I figure if we made an investment in the TV, then we should go the whole nine yards even though I have to learn new electronic things. I'm sure I will like the end result of this leap, especially when a really good nature show comes on. I just have to learn to adjust to change. I have to learn how to operate, record, watch shows, etc on a new DVR so I don't have to ask the kids how to work the TV every time I want to watch something. I also better clean my glasses.
If it weren't for my husband, I would probably still be watching an old black and white TV and using a cell phone that was held together with a rubber band.
We just keep leaping. Ribbit.
Steve also took the big leap when we got our first VCR. It was a great big unit, with a lid that popped-up on the top. It had a remote with a wire on it. It was state-of-the-art for the time. It was great. We could now rent movies and watch them. We just had to remember to rewind. The best part was that we could record shows and watch them at our leisure. I let Steve do the programming. I remember Steve programming the VCR to record 'The Paper Chase.' We still have those tapes. I ran one when we got the VCR we have now and the quality seemed fuzzy, but for the time, it was great.
I remember when I was pregnant with Stacy, Steve wanted to take another electronic leap and get a CD player that played 5 CD's at one time. I wasn't sure, of course I was worried about the expense with the up-coming baby and we had a CD player that played one CD at a time. Steve said that one didn't sound right; it sounded too crisp. I still was the cautious one. He had gotten it, but had packed it up to take it back to the store because I was so hesitant. I told him that we should keep it. Boy am I ever glad we kept it. It sounded great! We could play a whole bunch of CD's on it. We got a lot of enjoyment out of it. I don't know why I am so cautious, maybe it's a part of my mom that's in me. Maybe it's the OCD part of me that rejects change, I just can't figure it out.
The same thing happened with the TV we had in our living room in the house in Arlington, I was the hesitant one, but Steve was the one who wanted to take the leap and get it. It turned out to be a really good deal and gave us years of enjoyment. It was a wonderful TV.
I've also stubbornly held on to cell phones until they were considered archaic. I held onto the last phone I had for a long time, even though I had to hold it shut with a rubber band. I had one for years that had an antenna, long after it was probably a museum piece. When my phone was being held together with a rubber band, Steve finally took me into Verizon and helped me pick out another phone. I was going to go with one model and he encouraged me to get the next step up and I'm glad he did, I'm a lot happier with the phone he suggested I get.
Also, as years have passed by and electronics got more complicated to operate, I have been afraid to learn the operations of new electronic stuff. I still don't know how to watch a recorded show on the TV upstairs. It's Jeff's TV, he bought it. We got HD upstairs and had to give up our TiVo up there. The HD receiver looks really cool with its bright blue display, but I don't have a clue how to run it or which remote to use. Jeff taught me how to turn off the TV one night because he didn't feel like getting up out of the chair and I was right by the TV. I'm glad he didn't feel like getting out of the chair, at least I know how to turn it off and on. I do know how to watch a movie in HD on the Xbox because Steve and the kids taught me how and I wrote the instructions down and keep them in the box with my favorite HD movie, Planet Earth. I don't get stuff like that easily, I get steps mixed-up or press wrong buttons and get things really screwed-up. I never knew how to program a VCR either, but I know how to copy a video tape to DVD on our new VCR because Steve taught me. If it weren't for Steve, the clocks on our VCR and DVD players would have had blinking 00:00's on the display.
There's been another big leap in the works. Steve's had been wanting to get one of those flat screen TV's for the bedroom. Of course, true to form, I have been the hesitant, cautious one. He also wants to get HD on our satellite service for the bedroom and that means we'd lose the TiVo. Now I LOVE the TiVo in the bedroom. It's an older TiVo and it's so EASY. The way it's laid out, I learned how operate it easily and operate it every day. It's so easy for me to record a show and then watch it when I want to. So, needless to say, I am the hesitant one, more than that, I've been downright stubborn when it comes to my TiVo. It means I'd have to learn a new DVR and it wouldn't be a TiVo because the new TiVo's are way too pricey. There is also a remote that does everything and I wouldn't have to think about it, but that sucker costs $60.which seems way too expensive. I tend to get scared about learning new electronic stuff because it takes me a long time to learn it and it's hard to learn. I get the steps mixed-up or leave out a step and things get so messed-up that I have to get my husband or kids to restart everything. The funny thing is that I'm pretty good about learning stuff on the computer. I've been learning the latest versions of Photoshop, InDesign and Illustrator and am having fun doing so.
As far as getting HD on our downstairs TV,.I'm also not real thrilled about everything getting uprooted so they can run a wire through the wall. I wish this whole operation could be done wirelessly. I wish getting HD was as easy as setting the 'Sharpen' filter on Photoshop. Still, being able to see a nature show about ocean life in HD just might make the whole running a wire, getting HD and learning a new DVR thingamabob, worth it.
The TV picture is supposed to be clearer with HD. I've never really paid much attention to the difference. It has all looked pretty much the same to me, HD, regular D, stuff like that. I mean like HD is a little clearer, it's like getting new glasses or like using the 'Sharpen' filter in Photoshop and the colors seem a little brighter, but that's about it. It also might help if I would clean my glasses now and then, maybe that would help make the picture a little clearer too. Sometimes, something on TV will look real clear to me and I'll ask if that's HD and they'll say it's not and that will surprise me. The kids and I watched Jeff's Babylon 5 DVD's on his TV upstairs and that looked really great to me, but they said it wasn't HD. It sure looked like it to me, but apparently it wasn't. Maybe my glasses were clean then. The only time I've ever really seen much of a difference in the TV picture was when I watched my favorite video, 'Planet Earth.' Some of those scenes are really magnificent. Anyway, I'm happy to have the service we have downstairs because I can operate the TiVo, record what I want, when I want and watch what I want when I want, without having to ask someone to set it up for me. Still, a nature show as clear as 'Planet Earth' sounds pretty cool and would be worth running the wire and learning the new DVR thingamabob.
I wish I was as smart as my kids are with stuff like that. Both of them easily picked up running the system upstairs and that includes the video games. Stacy picked up how to do Netflix on the new TV instantly I really hope my reluctance with new electronics is not an 'old' thing. Believe it or not, my kids consider me 'old.' I don't. Anyhow, I got frustrated with my mom because she would have nothing to do with computers. One time, when I got to her house, the cable on her TV was all screwed up and the picture was really grainy like the signal wasn't coming in very well. It had been like that for some time and she was paying for cable and getting crap and she didn't even realize it. One phone call by me to the cable company fixed it. I hope I'm not getting like her. Still, I can't imagine her playing 'Angry Birds' or adjusting photos in Photoshop.
Anyway, Steve said he was going to research them and shop around. I told him that was fine and to take his time. I told him to pick out whatever he wanted because I trust him. He knows what he's doing and I don't know that much about flat TV's. I also knew he would get the best deal. He's real good at shopping around for the best deal. Every once in a while, I'd get an e-mail from him with a link to another TV. They all looked very nice. He would show me TV's when he was on the computer in the evening. I really wasn't in a hurry, and he's so good and thorough when shopping for something. I figured that I still had a little time with our old system.
Today, he took another big electronic leap. When I got home from work, it was like any other day. I walked into the bedroom and my jaw dropped! I said "HOLY S*#t! There, on top of the dresser was a flat TV. Not only that, but it's a 3-d flat screen TV and they bought a Blu-Ray player. He got a good deal too, I knew he would.
So now, it's time for another leap, I'm talking about the one to get HD on the satellite downstairs. My husband would really like to get it and said we won't be getting the best from the TV unless we get it. I figure if we made an investment in the TV, then we should go the whole nine yards even though I have to learn new electronic things. I'm sure I will like the end result of this leap, especially when a really good nature show comes on. I just have to learn to adjust to change. I have to learn how to operate, record, watch shows, etc on a new DVR so I don't have to ask the kids how to work the TV every time I want to watch something. I also better clean my glasses.
If it weren't for my husband, I would probably still be watching an old black and white TV and using a cell phone that was held together with a rubber band.
We just keep leaping. Ribbit.
Postscript: A few days ago, Steve showed me HD by showing me an episode of 'Game of Thrones' in Blu-Ray and yesterday I saw a little bit of the 'Caves' episode of 'Planet Earth' and the clarity was amazing. I mean like on 'Game of Thrones' the detail in the snow on the trees almost showed every little snowflake. In the 'Caves' episode of 'Planet Earth' it was like I was standing right there in that cave, viewing each and every one of the three million bats in that cave! The insect being consumed by the glow worm almost looked like it was under a microscope. Steve told me if we get HD in there, that anything telecast in HD would be that amazing. There's a National Geographic channel in HD and KERA (our local public TV station) also broadcasts in HD which means I could see NOVA and other shows like that in the same clarity as 'Planet Earth' and 'Game of Thrones.' Looks like I've been won over. Looks like soon I'll be learning a new DVR and enjoying the results.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Dan Part 4
Dan worked in the cafeteria in middle school, at Eastmoor High School and at Gahanna Lincoln High School and really liked it, especially the part about running the big dishwasher. At Sixpence School and after a battery of tests, it was determined that this was the best sort of job for Dan to do, work in a restaurant, running a dishwasher. Dan was in a training program at Cockrell's Restaurant in Westerville and loved it. His training period was coming to an end and mom and Sixpence School were busy looking for a job for him. They were considering a restaurant in downtown Columbus called 'Forester's.' It was right on the bus route, I would pass by it on the bus every day. My mom and I still weren't sure about it. Luckily, an opening came up at Cockrell's Restaurant, where they were training him and they liked Dan so well that they hired him. Dan was thrilled. He loved it there.
At first, my mom would wait with him at a bus stop on Cleveland Avenue and when the bus came, he would take it to Cockrell's in Westerville. After a while, the neighborhood where she dropped him off started going downhill and mom didn't feel safe there, so she ended up taking him to work and then going to her job.
The Cockrell's Restaurant people soon learned of Dan's amazing talent of being able to tell the day of the week someone was born on by just being given the date and year. When a customer would have a birthday, they would have Dan come out and tell them the day of the week they were born on. Dan loved this. He LOVES praise so this was pure happiness to him. The guy that ran Cockrell's was called 'Buzz' and there was a group of people that met there every so often known as the 'Old Buzzards' Club.' Dan loved it when one of them would have a birthday and he would get to tell one of them the day of the week they were born on. There was a whole bunch of people there and Dan got all sorts of praise. They were all really nice to Dan.
Dan learned how to bus tables and run dishes through the big dishwasher. He also made friends there. His first day there was a little rough, he accidentally broke a bunch of dishes and that had to be taken out of his paycheck (company policy). After that, Dan broke very few dishes. This generated a whole new set of bad stuff story ideas where 'Echo' - the Little Miss Echo character from his childhood who had grown up- would drop a whole bus pan full of dishes or would break a whole rack of dishes in Dan's imagination. In reality, Echo wouldn't have lasted there very long, but Dan had a great time coming up with new ideas for new trouble for Echo to get into.
Every once in a while, Dan, my parents and I would have breakfast or dinner at Cockrell's and Dan really loved that. He loved to eat there. He wanted his birthday parties there. He was thrilled that when I was going to get married, that we had our rehearsal dinner at Cockrell's.
Dan worked at Cockrell's for 18 years, busing tables and doing the dishes. Dan is great at anything repetitive. He can be like a machine, doing something over and over again and be happy as a clam. It's just when something changes, that would throw him off. Occasionally, the big dishwasher would breakdown and dishes would have to be done by hand until the repairman would get there. Dan would get to see the repairman repair the big dishwasher and Dan would enjoy getting to see the inner workings of the big dishwasher get repaired.. As I said earlier, Dan made friends at Cockrells, with both employees and some customers. Mr. Cockrell would have a Christmas party at his house each year for employees and Dan loved going to those. Dan had his own world and group of friends at this restaurant and this was really good for him.
When Steve and I got married, Dan was an usher at out wedding and he did very well. My husband and I moved to Fort Worth, Texas, a few days after we got married. Dan got my room. He also got my double bed, which he was happy about. The mattress had springs sticking through it and was really worn out, so mom, dad and Dan went out to buy him a new mattress. Dan had some money in the bank so this was going to be his first big purchase. Mom and Dad said that Dan picked out a 'Top of the line' mattress that cost some money, but it was what Dan wanted. Dan still has that mattress today.
Since we were in Texas, mom and dad would call us once a week on Sunday evening. Dan would be the one who placed the call. Every week on Sunday, around 7 PM, Dan would call, then mom and dad would talk to us. After a few years, we got an answering machine because of all of the telemarketing calls. Every week Dan would call and say into the answering machine, "This is Dan, we're calling to see how you are." It was always the same words, the same tone of voice, almost like a recording coming out of his mouth. Dan did that every single week, for years and years to come.
Finally, Cockrell's Restaurant closed up. The building now houses 'Graeter's Ice Cream' parlor. They still have a picture of the 'Old Buzzard's Club' in the back of the building. The kitchen that Dan used to work in became a party room. The Cockrell family and mom worked on finding Dan a new job. Dan began working as a dishwasher and bus boy for Bob Evans' Restaurant. The nice thing is that Bob Evans was located in Gahanna and mom didn't have as far to drive Dan to work. Mom was retired now and this suited her just fine. The people at Bob Evans' Restaurant were really nice to Dan. They really liked him and Dan loved it there. They had a bigger dishwasher and Dan really liked that as well. As time passed by, if there was a time when for one reason or another, if mom could not pick him up, someone from the restaurant would take Dan home.
Both mom and dad were retired. They had a nice little life at home with Dan and Dan had his daily routine, which he loved. Dan took trips with them. They went to Phoenix to visit dad's sister, Aunt Jeni and her family.They also visited Grandma Briggs who lived in Phoenix, close to Aunt Jeni, her daughter. Grandpa Briggs had died of cancer a few years back. Dan loved visiting Aunt Jeni and his cousin's. All of his cousins and Aunt Jeni and Uncle John were lovely to him. His one cousin, Mary Sue, is married to a guy named Karl, who was real nice to Dan. Dan took a liking to Karl and looked-up to him. Mary and Karl have sent him stuff and called him up on the phone occasionally. Dan loved that. Mary and Karl had two little boys at the time. Dan loved going to visit the family. Those little boys are now grown and have families of their own.
Dan, mom and dad made a few trips down to Texas to visit us. We had a little one-bedroom apartment in East Fort Worth. We had a sort-of 70's style apartment with rust-colored shag carpeting and avocado green appliances and sink in the kitchen. We even had a window in our kitchen, which was unusual for an apartment. It was a cool first apartment. The first time they came, Dan stayed in our apartment and mom and dad stayed at a motel.Instead of a sofa, we had a single bed that was kind-of a daybed with 2 bolster pillows and a cover. We made it into a bed for Dan while he stayed with us. One of the first mornings he was staying with us, my husband and I got a little taste of a deceptiveness about Dan that I never knew. Mom and dad were still at the motel and I was either out or in another room. Dan asked Steve if he would make Dan's bed! Dan acted like he didn't know how to do it, so Steve, nice guy that he is, made Dan's bed for him. When Steve told me about this later, my jaw dropped!
I told Steve that Dan had pulled a fast one on him, that Dan was perfectly capable of making his bed and had been able to for years. I was floored! I had never known Dan to deceive anybody before! He has an innocence about him that can fool anyone. I was also angry that he pulled that on my husband! What had he been pulling on people over the years? What had he pulled on my parents? What had he pulled on me? I don't think he pulled anything on me when we lived at home because I grew up with him, I knew what he could and couldn't do. I just didn't know he lied. I told my parents about it. They scolded him but didn't make as big of a deal about it like I thought they would. I asked them to have a talk with him and they did. The only thing was they didn't push the issue, they didn't react like I thought they would and that left me kind-of surprised. I never looked at my brother the same again. One thing about Dan, he loved being waited on and taken care of. He loved being a little kid and having stuff done for him. He remembers it like it was yesterday. In his mind, he is a little kid. This stunt he pulled on my husband was not innocent little kid stuff, Dan wanted to be looked after and he manipulated my husband and it made me angry.
As my parents grew older, they relied quite a bit on Dan's help around the house. Dan would do the dishes. clean the kitchen and vacuum. He also helped mom with the laundry. Our parents were getting less mobile due to arthritis and other ailments. Dan, who loved being looked after, was starting to help look after them.
At first, my mom would wait with him at a bus stop on Cleveland Avenue and when the bus came, he would take it to Cockrell's in Westerville. After a while, the neighborhood where she dropped him off started going downhill and mom didn't feel safe there, so she ended up taking him to work and then going to her job.
The Cockrell's Restaurant people soon learned of Dan's amazing talent of being able to tell the day of the week someone was born on by just being given the date and year. When a customer would have a birthday, they would have Dan come out and tell them the day of the week they were born on. Dan loved this. He LOVES praise so this was pure happiness to him. The guy that ran Cockrell's was called 'Buzz' and there was a group of people that met there every so often known as the 'Old Buzzards' Club.' Dan loved it when one of them would have a birthday and he would get to tell one of them the day of the week they were born on. There was a whole bunch of people there and Dan got all sorts of praise. They were all really nice to Dan.
Dan learned how to bus tables and run dishes through the big dishwasher. He also made friends there. His first day there was a little rough, he accidentally broke a bunch of dishes and that had to be taken out of his paycheck (company policy). After that, Dan broke very few dishes. This generated a whole new set of bad stuff story ideas where 'Echo' - the Little Miss Echo character from his childhood who had grown up- would drop a whole bus pan full of dishes or would break a whole rack of dishes in Dan's imagination. In reality, Echo wouldn't have lasted there very long, but Dan had a great time coming up with new ideas for new trouble for Echo to get into.
Every once in a while, Dan, my parents and I would have breakfast or dinner at Cockrell's and Dan really loved that. He loved to eat there. He wanted his birthday parties there. He was thrilled that when I was going to get married, that we had our rehearsal dinner at Cockrell's.
Dan worked at Cockrell's for 18 years, busing tables and doing the dishes. Dan is great at anything repetitive. He can be like a machine, doing something over and over again and be happy as a clam. It's just when something changes, that would throw him off. Occasionally, the big dishwasher would breakdown and dishes would have to be done by hand until the repairman would get there. Dan would get to see the repairman repair the big dishwasher and Dan would enjoy getting to see the inner workings of the big dishwasher get repaired.. As I said earlier, Dan made friends at Cockrells, with both employees and some customers. Mr. Cockrell would have a Christmas party at his house each year for employees and Dan loved going to those. Dan had his own world and group of friends at this restaurant and this was really good for him.
When Steve and I got married, Dan was an usher at out wedding and he did very well. My husband and I moved to Fort Worth, Texas, a few days after we got married. Dan got my room. He also got my double bed, which he was happy about. The mattress had springs sticking through it and was really worn out, so mom, dad and Dan went out to buy him a new mattress. Dan had some money in the bank so this was going to be his first big purchase. Mom and Dad said that Dan picked out a 'Top of the line' mattress that cost some money, but it was what Dan wanted. Dan still has that mattress today.
Since we were in Texas, mom and dad would call us once a week on Sunday evening. Dan would be the one who placed the call. Every week on Sunday, around 7 PM, Dan would call, then mom and dad would talk to us. After a few years, we got an answering machine because of all of the telemarketing calls. Every week Dan would call and say into the answering machine, "This is Dan, we're calling to see how you are." It was always the same words, the same tone of voice, almost like a recording coming out of his mouth. Dan did that every single week, for years and years to come.
Finally, Cockrell's Restaurant closed up. The building now houses 'Graeter's Ice Cream' parlor. They still have a picture of the 'Old Buzzard's Club' in the back of the building. The kitchen that Dan used to work in became a party room. The Cockrell family and mom worked on finding Dan a new job. Dan began working as a dishwasher and bus boy for Bob Evans' Restaurant. The nice thing is that Bob Evans was located in Gahanna and mom didn't have as far to drive Dan to work. Mom was retired now and this suited her just fine. The people at Bob Evans' Restaurant were really nice to Dan. They really liked him and Dan loved it there. They had a bigger dishwasher and Dan really liked that as well. As time passed by, if there was a time when for one reason or another, if mom could not pick him up, someone from the restaurant would take Dan home.
Dan in 1981 at Aunt Jeni's house in Phoenix
Both pictures are of Graeter's where Cockrell;s Restaurant used to be, where Dan used to work
Both mom and dad were retired. They had a nice little life at home with Dan and Dan had his daily routine, which he loved. Dan took trips with them. They went to Phoenix to visit dad's sister, Aunt Jeni and her family.They also visited Grandma Briggs who lived in Phoenix, close to Aunt Jeni, her daughter. Grandpa Briggs had died of cancer a few years back. Dan loved visiting Aunt Jeni and his cousin's. All of his cousins and Aunt Jeni and Uncle John were lovely to him. His one cousin, Mary Sue, is married to a guy named Karl, who was real nice to Dan. Dan took a liking to Karl and looked-up to him. Mary and Karl have sent him stuff and called him up on the phone occasionally. Dan loved that. Mary and Karl had two little boys at the time. Dan loved going to visit the family. Those little boys are now grown and have families of their own.
Dan, mom and dad made a few trips down to Texas to visit us. We had a little one-bedroom apartment in East Fort Worth. We had a sort-of 70's style apartment with rust-colored shag carpeting and avocado green appliances and sink in the kitchen. We even had a window in our kitchen, which was unusual for an apartment. It was a cool first apartment. The first time they came, Dan stayed in our apartment and mom and dad stayed at a motel.Instead of a sofa, we had a single bed that was kind-of a daybed with 2 bolster pillows and a cover. We made it into a bed for Dan while he stayed with us. One of the first mornings he was staying with us, my husband and I got a little taste of a deceptiveness about Dan that I never knew. Mom and dad were still at the motel and I was either out or in another room. Dan asked Steve if he would make Dan's bed! Dan acted like he didn't know how to do it, so Steve, nice guy that he is, made Dan's bed for him. When Steve told me about this later, my jaw dropped!
I told Steve that Dan had pulled a fast one on him, that Dan was perfectly capable of making his bed and had been able to for years. I was floored! I had never known Dan to deceive anybody before! He has an innocence about him that can fool anyone. I was also angry that he pulled that on my husband! What had he been pulling on people over the years? What had he pulled on my parents? What had he pulled on me? I don't think he pulled anything on me when we lived at home because I grew up with him, I knew what he could and couldn't do. I just didn't know he lied. I told my parents about it. They scolded him but didn't make as big of a deal about it like I thought they would. I asked them to have a talk with him and they did. The only thing was they didn't push the issue, they didn't react like I thought they would and that left me kind-of surprised. I never looked at my brother the same again. One thing about Dan, he loved being waited on and taken care of. He loved being a little kid and having stuff done for him. He remembers it like it was yesterday. In his mind, he is a little kid. This stunt he pulled on my husband was not innocent little kid stuff, Dan wanted to be looked after and he manipulated my husband and it made me angry.
As my parents grew older, they relied quite a bit on Dan's help around the house. Dan would do the dishes. clean the kitchen and vacuum. He also helped mom with the laundry. Our parents were getting less mobile due to arthritis and other ailments. Dan, who loved being looked after, was starting to help look after them.
-To Be Continued-
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Dan Part 3
We moved from Columbus, Ohio to Gahanna, Ohio in May of 1975. I was taking a year off of school to work and take a break from studying. Dan was in high school and transferred to Gahanna Lincoln High School, but fortunately, we had the summer to settle in to our new house. We occasionally would go back to visit our old neighborhood. We even visited the people who moved into our old house. Dan loved doing this, going to visit our old house. When you move into a different house, it always feels like you're staying at someone else's house until you get settled in and get your stuff unpacked and arranged the way you like it. The people who lived there before had some pretty hideous colors in a lot of the rooms, so we spend the summer painting and getting the house re-done to the way we liked it. My dad even added mirror tile to the living room. Like I said earlier, it was the 70's, it was the style.
Mirror tile in living room at our house in Gahanna
Dan helped with the fix-up of the house. Dad fixed up Dan's room. When we first moved in, his room had the most horrible curtains with a vile Early American-style floral design that could give you nightmares, left over from the people who lived there before us. Dad made Dan's room a place Dan could call his own. Dan loved it.
Dan's room after dad fixed it up.
Dan had to give up his swing set. We felt he was now too big, too old and too tall to swing on a child's swing set and it would have been too difficult to move the swing set anyway, it was older and probably would have fallen apart. Mom and dad decided to get Dan a rocking chair to replace the swinging. Dan was agreeable to this. They went to a furniture store with Dan and picked out a nice rocking chair and had it delivered to our house in Gahanna and had it placed in Dan's room. Now Dan could listen to his records while rocking in his chair, so the rocking chair added an advantage that Dan didn't have with swinging. He could also read books, bad stuff stories and 'Tippys' while rocking in his chair and listening to music. Dan loved it. He still has that rocking chair in our house in Texas and still plays records and reads while rocking in his chair.
When it came time for school to start, mom got Dan signed up and the school had a good Special Ed program. Since Dan was interested in electronic stuff, the people at school got Dan involved in the audio-visual program where Dan could help with the various projectors used at the school for various purposes. Dan loved it. He liked school at Gahanna Lincoln. The transition went very well.
It was sometime in the 1970's that dad brought home a whole bunch of calendars from the office that were going to be thrown away and gave them to Dan. It was a whole bunch of small calendars where you could see the whole month at one time and these calendars went back a number of years. Dan studied these calendars closely every day with a level of concentration that was amazing. Soon, Dan was able to tell what day of the week certain events occurred. His savant talent had been awakened. It wasn't long until you could give him your date of birth and year and he could tell you the day of the week you were born on. He could tell you very quickly and he would be right!
Around this same time, Dan started getting really good at remembering telephone numbers. Part of his brain became sort-of a telephone book. It helped if the numbers had some meaning. He remembered the numbers for repair services when mom and dad needed something repaired. He began to remember phone numbers of several of mom's friends. The list of phone numbers in his head grew as time went by. This was handy in the days before cell phones where you would have lots of numbers stored. Often, instead of going for the phone book, one of us would just say, "Dan, what's the number to...?" He would know and he would get the number right.
Graduation Ceremony at Gahanna Lincoln High School in 1976 where Dan graduated from high school
Dan after his graduation from Gahanna Lincoln High School
Dan graduated from Gahanna Lincoln High School in 1976. Years later, I learned that my future brother-in-law also graduated from the same high school on the same day. Mom had been looking into options for Dan after high school. She worked for the State of Ohio, for the Bureau of Disability Determination, so she had a few connections. She first arranged to have a number of tests done through the state of Ohio on Dan to determine what he could and couldn't do and what would be a good fit for him in the workplace. The tests showed mostly what we already knew about Dan, that he was mentally retarded (although my mother had difficulty using the word, "retarded" when describing him). He's high-functioning and educable, but limited. We had hoped that Dan could do something simple with electronics like on a production line doing repetitive work, since he was so interested in electronics. The tests revealed that he is quite color blind and so could not sort out different colored wires, so that line of work was out for him.
Dan had loved running the dishwasher in the school kitchen cafeteria in middle school and doing that in a restaurant was considered to be a good possibility for him. Through research, mom found a place called 'Six Pence School' that could train him to function in the working world. It was near our old neighborhood in Columbus, so was easy to get to. Dan attended 'Six Pence School' and really liked it. They were good to him. I don't remember what all he did there, or what he learned, but I think it was basic simple stuff like writing a check, paying bills, how to ride the bus and how to handle working at a job. Part of their training was on-the-job training. There was a restaurant in Westerville, Ohio that trained people from Six Pence School to do restaurant work. Dan started his training there. Dan loved it. He made friends with the people who worked there, he got to run a big restaurant-style dishwasher and the people who ran Cockrell's were lovely people and treated Dan like one of their family.
Dan trained at Cockrell's Restaurant for several months. The next step was to get Dan into a real job. This would have to be a place on a bus route and the people who worked there had to be understanding of Dan's disabilities.
-To Be Continued-
Monday, March 19, 2012
Dan Part 2
This is a continuation of my first blog, about Dan, my younger brother who's mentally retarded. Dan has had a wide variety of teachers. He had Special Ed teacher at one elementary school who just let him run around the classroom while the rest of the class conducted school. My mother was furious when she heard about this and made sure that the teacher had him sit down and participate in the lesson. That's one thing about having a special needs child, you have to keep tabs on how their doing in class and make sure the teacher is seeing to the individual needs of your child. My mom did just that. When Dan had to go into a regular class because there weren't any Special Ed classes available for the 2nd grade, she made sure he was doing okay in school, in fact, she got him a tutor.
Dan's tutor was named Mr. Case. Mr. Case would come to the house once a week and tutor Dan. Mr. Case had something wrong with his sight, so he had a disability himself. He couldn't drive so mom would either pick him up at his apartment and then bring him home, or he lived close enough that he could walk to and from our house when the weather was nice. He relied heavily on public transportation like buses. He was a great big guy and was very stern, but he could be nice also. He just had a demeanor about him that felt formal, like you couldn't sit down with him, joke and shoot the breeze. He had this presence about him that I can't describe, like you had better be on your best behavior, but he was nice, not nasty. We had to make sure 'Tippy Books' were put away, out of site when he came over. He always tutored Dan in his room. Mr. Case collected coins and took Dan to a coin convention once. He took Dan to the Ohio State Fair once too. He was good with Dan and helped Dan a lot, especially with stuff like arithmetic (math - it was called arithmetic back then). I think he helped Dan a lot with writing and he and my parents are probably why Dan uses such good grammar and spells so well when he writes to this day. He tutored Dan for several years. I remember helping Dan practice with addition and subtraction flash cards to get ready for tutoring sessions. I don't know whatever happened to this tutor. He wasn't married when we knew him, he was an odd sort of fellow, but he did help Dan a lot. Years later, mom told me that she thought he was a little too stern with Dan. After Mr. Case could no longer tutor him, Dan had a female tutor, who I liked much better. She was easier to talk to and more laid back, yet she did just as good of a job teaching Dan and keeping him caught up with classwork.
One thing about Dan, his mind is like that of a child's mind. Sometimes he's like a child of about 5 and sometimes he's more like a child of about 7 or 8. When he was a little kid, it was great. I think childhood was his favorite time. His child-like manner fit him just fine because he was a child. Like all children, Dan started growing up. He got taller and sometime in his teens, his voice dropped a couple of octaves and became much deeper. His little kid screams sounded strange, like he had a cold or something. He could no longer do his 'Stew Scream" which was more of a high-pitched whine, but now sounded more like a cough. Dan also started getting facial hair, he started growing a beard. Thus began a battle with the beard that continues to this day. His beard isn't just any beard, it's coarse, and thick and would be difficult for even a so-called 'normal' man to have to deal with on a daily basis. My dad shaved him at first. He taught Dan how to shave with an electric razor. Dan could never get it right. He would enter a room and mom would ask him if he shaved. He would insist that he did shave, but he missed spots and looked ragged. My dad would help him fix it. Dan could never get it right, himself. He would tend to go over the same part of his face, over and over again until his skin was raw and leave other parts, like on his neck with hairs sticking out. It didn't help that his eyesight isn't the best either, even with glasses, because of his perception problem. This was in the 70's and dad would tease my mom and say that Dan should just become a 'hippie' and wear a great big beard. Mom would get all flustered when he said stuff like that, even though she knew he was just teasing.
To this very day, Dan cannot shave correctly. An electric razor was just too wimpy for that coarse steel-wool-like beard of his. My husband taught him how to use a disposable razor and shaving cream and then use an electric razor. One day, he even shaved Dan, even though he said that he wasn't going to do that. My husband just reached the end of his rope that day. Dan still doesn't get it. He often has a 5 O'Clock shadow right after he shaved.Dan often has tufts of hair sticking out of his neck. The other day, a lady at Style America gave him a haircut and shaved the spots of hair sticking out of his neck, even though they don't normally shave people.That lady is an angel and deserved a good tip. Dan only tipped her a dollar because that's what mom tipped her hairdresser back in the 1970's. This is just one of many frustrations in dealing with Dan.
Dan's imaginary character of 'Echo' from the Little Miss Echo doll he had when he was little seemed to grow up with him. Dan continued to have me draw pictures of Echo getting into trouble and continuously came up with new situations for Echo to mess up and get yelled at. Dan would want to talk to me about the ideas and so we had 'talk sessions' where he would talk about what Echo was up to. Talk sessions became less frequent as time went by, but if Dan did something real nice for me, I would give him either 'tippys', a bad stuff story or a talk session depending on what I had time for.
As Dan was growing up, he didn't have any kind of social life. He had a few friends in school, but Dan didn't seek them out, he would remain in his little world and if they happened to say 'hi' he would say 'hi' back. Dan was growing up in other ways too. When I helped him clean his room, I would find the latest JCPenney catalog on his bed, opened to the ladies' girdle page. I guess that was his version of a 'girlie magazine.' I remember dad having the special 'talk' with Dan in the basement one day. Most of the time, Dan still seemed like a little kid. He wasn't big in muscle and wasn't tall, so he could get away with acting like he was younger than he really was.
He kept many of the same interests, including records, the mixer, the vacuum cleaner and appliances as he grew up. When he was old enough to use mom's electric mixer, he would make different kinds of cakes. He would usually make layer cakes. When mom went grocery shopping, he would ask her to get a new flavor of cake mix with frosting and we all enjoyed the cakes he made and frosted. Back in those days, you could also get frosting mix in a box, that you would have to prepare using the mixer so that gave him double opportunity to run the mixer. I no longer see frosting mix on the shelves at the grocery store, it's all ready-made in little cans. I like the convenience of it, but I think Dan liked making the frosting in the mixer.
Dan also had responsibilities around the house. After dinner, he and I would clear the table, load and start the dishwasher. After a while, he learned to load and start the dishwasher himself. He would also help with the laundry, though mom would have to sort it. Dan would also help dad with yard work such as raking leaves and sweeping grass clippings. I would cook dinner sometimes and Dan would always set the table. Mom made sure Dan knew the proper way to set a table.
There was one thing that Dan loved to do ever since he was big enough to do so and that was swing. We had a metal swing set which later got switched out for a bigger metal swing set and he would spend hours outside just swinging back and forth. That motion seemed to sooth him. We had to make sure he didn't swing too hard, especially when he got bigger. I remember dad having to reinforce the cement where the swing set was in the ground so that Dan wouldn't tip it out of the ground while swinging. Dad had to replace chains on the swings every so often. Mom would stick her head out the door and tell Dan not to swing so hard. Once in a while, the chain would break and Dan would fall out of the swing, but the next day, he'd be right back out there on that swing again. Dad would also have to oil the place where the chain attached to the bolts because they would squeak a lot. We now have a neighbor who's little girl loves to swing as much as Dan did and when I hear her swing, it reminds me of when Dan was little and I would hear that rhythmic squeak-squeak-squeak of the swing.
Sometimes Dan didn't use common sense when he went outside to swing. One time I remember mom yelling at Dan for going outside on a cold day, to swing. He wore his winter coat, but wore shorts. When mom yelled at him Dan said he didn't like to wear the long pants because they were scratchy. That's another thing, Dan was ultra sensitive to anything the least bit scratchy. My grandma was a dressmaker and would line his slacks with silk so that he would wear them. Dan would put together the oddest-looking outfits because they were comfortable and he didn't care about style. Of course mom would send him back to his room to put on something that looked better if we were going out anywhere. Dan had a black cotton/polyester shirt that he called his 'black washer shirt' because he wore it when he would start the washing machine. He loved that shirt and wore it until it was stained and he outgrew it.
As Dan grew older, he still loved to swing. Like I said, his body was growing up, but not his mind. Dad kept swing set in repair and our neighbors knew Dan from the time he was a baby and knew Dan was special needs, so they didn't care about his constant swinging. They were always nice to him and to us. We had great neighbors. Mom just didn't want Dan giggling to himself and acting silly on the swing, which he sometimes did. One of the neighbor girls was dating a guy who had a car that Dan liked. It was an old Ford Galaxy and it wasn't anything special, Dan just liked it. These neighbors lived in back of us. Our swing set was situated so you could either face the back of our house when on a swing, or face the neighbor's house. We just had a chain link fence so you could see their backyard quite easily. When the boyfriend would come to visit his girlfriend, Dan would situated himself on the swing so that he would face their house so he could see the Ford Galaxy. Mom, dad and I had to keep tabs on Dan so that girl and her boyfriend could have a little privacy. If we saw he was over and Dan was swinging facing their house, we would call him inside.
Dan's tutor was named Mr. Case. Mr. Case would come to the house once a week and tutor Dan. Mr. Case had something wrong with his sight, so he had a disability himself. He couldn't drive so mom would either pick him up at his apartment and then bring him home, or he lived close enough that he could walk to and from our house when the weather was nice. He relied heavily on public transportation like buses. He was a great big guy and was very stern, but he could be nice also. He just had a demeanor about him that felt formal, like you couldn't sit down with him, joke and shoot the breeze. He had this presence about him that I can't describe, like you had better be on your best behavior, but he was nice, not nasty. We had to make sure 'Tippy Books' were put away, out of site when he came over. He always tutored Dan in his room. Mr. Case collected coins and took Dan to a coin convention once. He took Dan to the Ohio State Fair once too. He was good with Dan and helped Dan a lot, especially with stuff like arithmetic (math - it was called arithmetic back then). I think he helped Dan a lot with writing and he and my parents are probably why Dan uses such good grammar and spells so well when he writes to this day. He tutored Dan for several years. I remember helping Dan practice with addition and subtraction flash cards to get ready for tutoring sessions. I don't know whatever happened to this tutor. He wasn't married when we knew him, he was an odd sort of fellow, but he did help Dan a lot. Years later, mom told me that she thought he was a little too stern with Dan. After Mr. Case could no longer tutor him, Dan had a female tutor, who I liked much better. She was easier to talk to and more laid back, yet she did just as good of a job teaching Dan and keeping him caught up with classwork.
Dan as a teenager.
One thing about Dan, his mind is like that of a child's mind. Sometimes he's like a child of about 5 and sometimes he's more like a child of about 7 or 8. When he was a little kid, it was great. I think childhood was his favorite time. His child-like manner fit him just fine because he was a child. Like all children, Dan started growing up. He got taller and sometime in his teens, his voice dropped a couple of octaves and became much deeper. His little kid screams sounded strange, like he had a cold or something. He could no longer do his 'Stew Scream" which was more of a high-pitched whine, but now sounded more like a cough. Dan also started getting facial hair, he started growing a beard. Thus began a battle with the beard that continues to this day. His beard isn't just any beard, it's coarse, and thick and would be difficult for even a so-called 'normal' man to have to deal with on a daily basis. My dad shaved him at first. He taught Dan how to shave with an electric razor. Dan could never get it right. He would enter a room and mom would ask him if he shaved. He would insist that he did shave, but he missed spots and looked ragged. My dad would help him fix it. Dan could never get it right, himself. He would tend to go over the same part of his face, over and over again until his skin was raw and leave other parts, like on his neck with hairs sticking out. It didn't help that his eyesight isn't the best either, even with glasses, because of his perception problem. This was in the 70's and dad would tease my mom and say that Dan should just become a 'hippie' and wear a great big beard. Mom would get all flustered when he said stuff like that, even though she knew he was just teasing.
To this very day, Dan cannot shave correctly. An electric razor was just too wimpy for that coarse steel-wool-like beard of his. My husband taught him how to use a disposable razor and shaving cream and then use an electric razor. One day, he even shaved Dan, even though he said that he wasn't going to do that. My husband just reached the end of his rope that day. Dan still doesn't get it. He often has a 5 O'Clock shadow right after he shaved.Dan often has tufts of hair sticking out of his neck. The other day, a lady at Style America gave him a haircut and shaved the spots of hair sticking out of his neck, even though they don't normally shave people.That lady is an angel and deserved a good tip. Dan only tipped her a dollar because that's what mom tipped her hairdresser back in the 1970's. This is just one of many frustrations in dealing with Dan.
Dan's imaginary character of 'Echo' from the Little Miss Echo doll he had when he was little seemed to grow up with him. Dan continued to have me draw pictures of Echo getting into trouble and continuously came up with new situations for Echo to mess up and get yelled at. Dan would want to talk to me about the ideas and so we had 'talk sessions' where he would talk about what Echo was up to. Talk sessions became less frequent as time went by, but if Dan did something real nice for me, I would give him either 'tippys', a bad stuff story or a talk session depending on what I had time for.
As Dan was growing up, he didn't have any kind of social life. He had a few friends in school, but Dan didn't seek them out, he would remain in his little world and if they happened to say 'hi' he would say 'hi' back. Dan was growing up in other ways too. When I helped him clean his room, I would find the latest JCPenney catalog on his bed, opened to the ladies' girdle page. I guess that was his version of a 'girlie magazine.' I remember dad having the special 'talk' with Dan in the basement one day. Most of the time, Dan still seemed like a little kid. He wasn't big in muscle and wasn't tall, so he could get away with acting like he was younger than he really was.
He kept many of the same interests, including records, the mixer, the vacuum cleaner and appliances as he grew up. When he was old enough to use mom's electric mixer, he would make different kinds of cakes. He would usually make layer cakes. When mom went grocery shopping, he would ask her to get a new flavor of cake mix with frosting and we all enjoyed the cakes he made and frosted. Back in those days, you could also get frosting mix in a box, that you would have to prepare using the mixer so that gave him double opportunity to run the mixer. I no longer see frosting mix on the shelves at the grocery store, it's all ready-made in little cans. I like the convenience of it, but I think Dan liked making the frosting in the mixer.
Dan also had responsibilities around the house. After dinner, he and I would clear the table, load and start the dishwasher. After a while, he learned to load and start the dishwasher himself. He would also help with the laundry, though mom would have to sort it. Dan would also help dad with yard work such as raking leaves and sweeping grass clippings. I would cook dinner sometimes and Dan would always set the table. Mom made sure Dan knew the proper way to set a table.
There was one thing that Dan loved to do ever since he was big enough to do so and that was swing. We had a metal swing set which later got switched out for a bigger metal swing set and he would spend hours outside just swinging back and forth. That motion seemed to sooth him. We had to make sure he didn't swing too hard, especially when he got bigger. I remember dad having to reinforce the cement where the swing set was in the ground so that Dan wouldn't tip it out of the ground while swinging. Dad had to replace chains on the swings every so often. Mom would stick her head out the door and tell Dan not to swing so hard. Once in a while, the chain would break and Dan would fall out of the swing, but the next day, he'd be right back out there on that swing again. Dad would also have to oil the place where the chain attached to the bolts because they would squeak a lot. We now have a neighbor who's little girl loves to swing as much as Dan did and when I hear her swing, it reminds me of when Dan was little and I would hear that rhythmic squeak-squeak-squeak of the swing.
Sometimes Dan didn't use common sense when he went outside to swing. One time I remember mom yelling at Dan for going outside on a cold day, to swing. He wore his winter coat, but wore shorts. When mom yelled at him Dan said he didn't like to wear the long pants because they were scratchy. That's another thing, Dan was ultra sensitive to anything the least bit scratchy. My grandma was a dressmaker and would line his slacks with silk so that he would wear them. Dan would put together the oddest-looking outfits because they were comfortable and he didn't care about style. Of course mom would send him back to his room to put on something that looked better if we were going out anywhere. Dan had a black cotton/polyester shirt that he called his 'black washer shirt' because he wore it when he would start the washing machine. He loved that shirt and wore it until it was stained and he outgrew it.
As Dan grew older, he still loved to swing. Like I said, his body was growing up, but not his mind. Dad kept swing set in repair and our neighbors knew Dan from the time he was a baby and knew Dan was special needs, so they didn't care about his constant swinging. They were always nice to him and to us. We had great neighbors. Mom just didn't want Dan giggling to himself and acting silly on the swing, which he sometimes did. One of the neighbor girls was dating a guy who had a car that Dan liked. It was an old Ford Galaxy and it wasn't anything special, Dan just liked it. These neighbors lived in back of us. Our swing set was situated so you could either face the back of our house when on a swing, or face the neighbor's house. We just had a chain link fence so you could see their backyard quite easily. When the boyfriend would come to visit his girlfriend, Dan would situated himself on the swing so that he would face their house so he could see the Ford Galaxy. Mom, dad and I had to keep tabs on Dan so that girl and her boyfriend could have a little privacy. If we saw he was over and Dan was swinging facing their house, we would call him inside.
1963 Ford Galaxy similar to the one Dan liked so well, it's even a similar color.
1974, Dan and I in back of our house on Scottwood Road. Dan had gotten taller than me.
It was around the time that Dan was in 6th grade and I was in middle school that our mom started to work full-time. Mom had Dan transferred to a school that was walking distance from our Grandma Compton's apartment on James Road. The middle school (back then, it was called 'junior high' school) was already walking distance from grandma's apartment so it was no problem for me. Grandma became a 'room mother' for Dan's class, which was a mother of one of the students that helped with class parties and such. Since our mom was at work, grandma became the 'room mother.' Dan's class was treated to grandma's home baked goodies. Grandma could bake cookies and cakes as good as or better than any professional chef. The stuff she made was special and extra good. Dan's class really liked having his grandma as one of their room mothers. It was also nice to come in to grandma's apartment after school when she was baking, the place always smelled so good. I loved it when she'd bake bread and make cinnamon rolls. The only thing I didn't like was that some of grandma's friends, who visited frequently because grandma often would be making a dress for them, would treat Dan and I like we were little tiny kids. I was a teenager and looked younger than I was and Dan just seemed younger. It was not fun. Dan didn't like it mostly because he was not allowed to 'shake' when grandma had company. (Shaking was when Dan moved around the house shaking a rag or string back and forth while making 'shushing' sounds.)
Dan adapted to middle school('junior high'). When he started middle school, I started high school. I took the bus home and Dan was able to walk to grandma's apartment. He had a rough first day in junior high school, I remember mom getting upset with him about something related to it, but I don't remember exactly what it was. He did adapt.That's the thing about Dan, he adapts, it just takes him a little longer and there's nothing wrong with that. The school had Special Ed classes that he took and he did just fine.
When Dan made the big jump to high school, that went better than the switch to middle school. The Special Ed teacher at his high school was really, really nice. She was a real good teacher too. Dan made friends and liked high school. At the end of the school year, this teacher (a sweet lady by the name of Miss Wilson) and the special ed department took the whole special ed class on a weekend camping trip. This was Dan's very first camping trip. He had a wonderful time. The teachers took great care of the kids. Dan got to interact with others and was away from mom, dad and I for a whole weekend. This was one of the coolest things a group of Special Ed teachers had done for Dan and the other students. Dan still remembers it and the good time he had.
In 1975, our neighborhood was going downhill and dad decided it was time to move to another neighborhood. We fixed-up the house big-time with paint, carpeting, wallpaper (a brand known as 'Wall-Tex'- sounds Texan but Texas had nothing to do with it) and mirror tiles. (You heard (read) right, mirror tiles, with a marbleized pattern on them. What can I say? It was the 70's.) Then mom and dad put the house on the market. I remember one time, dad was talking to the Realtor who had come over to the house and Dan was making a big racket while playing with the buffer attachment to the vacuum cleaner in his room. Dan remembers dad telling him to "Stop playing with that carpet sweeper!" Dan stopped, but I think he thought it was kind-of funny. He still talks about it sometimes.
Fixing up the bathroom. Yeah, I know, the sink stand is red, but the house sold real quickly.
We did find a house in Gahanna and sold our old house on Scottwood Road in Columbus. This move was big, we were leaving the house Dan and I grew up in and going to a different house in a different city. Dan would have to change high schools and we wondered how that was going to go. Dan had settled in real well with high school life with the Special Ed class at his current high school.
-To Be Continued-
Friday, March 16, 2012
Dan
My brother Dan, is mentally retarded. Sometime when my mom was pregnant with him, through no fault of hers, his brain was denied oxygen long enough to cause brain damage. We don't know if it was during pregnancy or during labor and delivery, or what caused it. My mom realized it when he was a little baby and she kept seeing this blank stare in his eyes. He still has that blank stare to this day and he's 54 years old. His development was slow and not like that of other babies. My mom had him tested and those who tested him gave her the news she had suspected, that there was something wrong in his brain.She and dad did everything they could to help him. They got him specialists. He was slightly cross-eyed, so they had one eye operated on and then the other. They had him go to a speech therapist. It took him a long time to learn how to talk. The speech therapist recommended that my parents get him this doll that was on the market at the time called 'Little Miss Echo.' It had a tape recorder in it and you could record your voice and have it talk in your voice. That proved to be a big help to Dan and his speaking. He also liked an alligator puppet he had that he called 'Creamus.' I don't know where he got the name, but one day, he was talking up a storm, with 'Creamus', asking him if he tipped something over or if he spilled something or other such things.
It's funny to watch an old commercial for 'Little Miss Echo' because Dan was totally different with this tape recorder doll.The ad shows some little girl playing school with the doll and singing with her recorded voice singing through the doll. Dan was all boy and did not play with the doll like a girl would. He mostly liked to punch her forehead in and watch the punch mark go away as the rubber-like material would take the shape of the forehead back. He made all kinds of interesting noises and played them back. Dan would pretend that she got into all kinds of trouble, trouble that he might have thought about getting into, but didn't dare. He just called her 'Echo' and would have my dad and I draw cartoons of her getting into all kinds of trouble. The kind of humor he understands is slapstick, where stuff spills or gets knocked over, Laurel and Hardy type of humor. Most of the cartoons would be of Echo tipping over stuff like the console stereo, appliances, etc. thus the cartoons were called 'Tippys' (sic). For his birthdays, he always wanted me to make him 'tippy books' that were little hand-made comic books of Echo tipping over stuff and getting into trouble. He would also have me tell him 'Bad Stuff Stories' where Echo got into trouble for knocking over stuff or not thinking and making a mess of things. To this day, he requests that I type him a 'Bad Stuff Story' for Christmas and for his birthday. The doll itself fell apart years ago, but the character still remains in his imagination.
Little Miss Echo
Growing up with Dan had its ups and downs, like with any other sibling, only Dan was not like any other sibling. Dan was my only sibling. I didn't know what it was like to have a "normal" sibling. He's two years younger than I am. I can remember when he was a baby. I can remember all of the trouble my parents had potty training him. It was harder for him than with most kids and he didn't learn it until he was around 4 or something like that. When we were growing up together, he couldn't play board games or card games, he didn't understand them or the rules. He also wasn't interested in them and therefore didn't try to understand them. I used to envy other kids who had siblings that could play games with them. I would draw pictures for Dan on this large chalkboard we had in the basement. We had a large basement. My dad had fixed-up part of the basement and made it into a cool playroom. It was a great place to play in on a hot day. Anyway, about the only way I could really play with him would be to draw pictures for him and he loved that.
Dan wasn't interested in things that a lot of other kids were interested in. He didn't like sports and didn't understand them. He didn't understand a lot of cartoons and TV shows unless they involved slapstick humor. He didn't play with other kids, he was in his own little world. He was interested in things like appliances, record players, vacuum cleaners and stuff like that. He was also fascinated with furnaces. I remember once, mom took us to a ballet production of the 'Nutcracker Suite' at Veterans Memorial theater in Columbus, Ohio. I remember seeing the ballerinas dance on stage with fake snow falling and thought it was beautiful and really cool. Dan kept having mom take him to the restroom. He didn't have to go, he was bored with the ballet and wanted to look at the heat registers and the plumbing. It made my mom so frustrated.
Dan was mostly interested in appliances like washing machines. He still likes to watch the washing machine run. We recently got a high efficiency top load washer with a clear lid and Dan loves to watch it spin. He liked and still likes mixers and like to watch them mix up cake batter. When he got old enough to run the mixer himself, he liked to try different cake mixes so see how the cake would taste.
He also loved records and loved to watch them spin and listen to music on record players and stereos. He didn't care who the musical artist was, he'd listen to almost anything. When he went over to other peoples' houses, he'd want to see their Hi-Fi right away. The thing he remembers most about the church we went to when we were little was a Hi-Fi they had in the lounge where they held his Sunday school class. I remember one year when we went trick-or-treating on Halloween, he didn't care about getting candy, he wanted to go into other peoples' houses to see their record player. Mom and dad had to teach him proper manners so he wouldn't just barge in to somebody's house to look at their record player and when we visited, he had to ask nicely and say 'please' and 'thank you.' Mom and dad made sure Dan learned good manners.
He was also fascinated with vacuum cleaners and cement mixers. He loved to watch the thing that holds the cement on a cement mixer turn and the faster it turned, the more he liked it. When we were riding in the car, Dan would see a cement mixer and would exclaim, "A cement mixer!" like it was something unusual and special. Mom and dad had an old Kirby vacuum cleaner that he loved to run. He also liked to play around with it when he was a teenager. He's still fascinated with vacuum cleaners and recently was delighted when one of Stacy's friends was selling Kirby vacuum cleaners and wanted to demonstrate a new Kirby vacuum cleaner at our house one day and he got to watch the demonstration.
Old Sunbeam Mixmaster like the one my mom had that Dan was fascinated with
Dan has always had a fascination with old record players like this one
Like the old Kirby vacuum cleaner that my parents had that Dan was fascinated with.
He also loved to start the washer. He was just a little kid, but was fascinated with the washer and so mom would take him to the basement and let him turn the button to start the washing machine. He loved to watch repairmen come and fix appliances that had to be fixed. We had to make sure he didn't get in the repairman's way. One time the pump went out and Dan got to keep the old pump as a souvenir. One time the agitator cracked and Dan got to keep the old agitator. One time when Dan was little, mom went to check on him after he had gone to bed and Dan had taken the old agitator to bed with him like a kid would take a stuffed animal to bed with him. Mom had to re-do his bed and tell him to leave the agitator out of the bed.
One year, we got a washing machine that had an agitator that went up and down rather than back and forth and the lid had a window in it. Dan was thrilled that he got to watch the washer run through that little window. I guess that design of agitator didn't work out because years later after that washer gave out, mom and dad bought a washer with an agitator that goes back and forth. Dan didn't care, he liked either one.
Dan also had a fascination with the dishwasher. In the early 1960's, my mom developed a severe skin allergy to dish detergent. This was in the days when most houses didn't have a dishwasher. People washed and dried their dishes by hand. Ugh. Anyway, the doctor had told mom that she couldn't wash dishes if she wanted the rash on her hands to clear up, that dad would have to do the dishes. Dad was not about to do the dishes, so one Saturday, we drove to someplace and dad bought a portable dishwasher.It got delivered to our house the following week. It was a big white thing on wheels and every night, mom would wheel it up to the sink, load the dishes in it, hook the hose up to the faucet and run the dishwasher. It would take water from the faucet and drain it out into the sink .Dan would love to watch it run. When he got older, he learned how to load and run the dishwasher. To this day, he loads and runs the built-in dishwasher in our house every day.
The damage in Dan's brain is in the area involving judgement. He cannot make good judgement, to this day, he is much better at repetitive things and shouldn't be put in a position to require judgement. Also, part of his brain dealing with sight is damaged. He can see alright, with glasses. It's not his eyes, but how his brain perceives what he sees that's affected. He always had trouble catching a ball because when you throw it to him, it doesn't look right to him and he would sometimes run away so the ball wouldn't hit him. He doesn't see the same way we do, but he sees, with his glasses, well enough to get around and to live his daily life. Because of the damage to his brain, he should never, ever drive a car. He shouldn't even ride a bicycle. He has to rely on public transportation. When he was an adult and came to live with us, he was really upset when the C-Cart took away their routes in our neighborhood in McKinney a couple of years ago because they took away what little independence he had.
When he was little, my parents got him one of those push-pedal cars like you'd see in the 1960's. He couldn't figure out how to make it go. He couldn't put it together in his brain to push the pedals back and forth to propel it forward.We tried to show him but it was to no avail. He also couldn't figure out how to make a tricycle go even though we tried to show him this too.
A push pedal car similar to what Dan had only his was green
When Dan would get frustrated, or if mom got after for something he shouldn't have done, he would scream. He would make little noises he called screams about something he wasn't real happy about. Sometimes the noises weren't so little, sometimes they were blood curdling screams. When he was 5 years old and had a high-pitched voice, it was funny sometimes. He even had names for his different screams. There was the 'Stew Scream' for when my mom made stew. He didn't like stew. There was his 'Grandma's Apartment Scream' and his 'Store Scream' when we'd drive past a store that he wanted to go in and get something. There was the 'Black Scream' which was loud and happened when mom would yell at him for something. Then there was the queen mother of all screams, the 'Silver Scream.' This scream usually happened when mom was trying to clean boogers out of his nose. He didn't like his nose messed with, but was unable to clean it properly. It could be heard in the back yard, especially when the windows were open. Often, the whole neighborhood knew when Dan was getting his nose cleaned out. This scream was a long, extended scream and he got in big trouble for letting a 'Silver Scream' loose. Sometimes mom would get after him for something and Dan would say, "What if I scream?" Mom would say, "You better not scream!" Dan would say, "What if I do?" Mom would say, "You'll get in big trouble if you scream!" This would go on and on until mom had enough and put a stop to it.
Dan had a lot of nervous energy when he was little. He didn't know what to do with it all. One of the things he did was to walk around the house shaking a rag. He'd run it over counter top, credenzas and other pieces of furniture. He'd make little shushing noises while running the rag around. We called it 'shaking.' Some of my friends who would come over to visit thought he was dusting the furniture. He had special 'shakers' (various rags and small strings) that he carried with him everywhere like a kid would a stuffed animal. He would switch 'shakers' every now and then. My grandma didn't like him doing it for too long when he was at her apartment and didn't like him doing it when she had company over. She'd give Dan a string which he would keep on one of her door knobs. When we visited her apartment, he would get a certain amount of time that he was allowed to 'shake' then he had to put his string up and do something else. One time grandma took him to a five and dime store near where she lived and bought him a scrapbook. She wanted him to do something "worthwhile" rather than 'shaking.' She gave him some magazines and told him to cut out pretty pictures and paste them in the scrapbook. Dan pasted pictures of washers, record players and other appliances and grandma wasn't real thrilled with his choice of art.
This is just a little bit of what growing up with Dan and living with him is like. This is part of a series of blogs that I am writing about him.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Spring Break, Ohio vs. Texas
Friday, Stacy had the last test in a stressful week filled with testing. It was the week before Spring Break and teachers like to be sure that the students are thoroughly tested before going off to Spring Break. I remember in Ohio, the big thing was to go to Florida for Spring Break. I don't see that so much here in Texas. Some people go out of town to places like San Antonio, South Padre Island or Corpus Christi, but I don't see the mad rush to Florida that I saw in Ohio. I heard that beach front places in Florida are packed this time of year. I guess because it's less gray and rainy here and there's a better chance of warm weather here than in Ohio, so it's not such a big deal. In Columbus, Ohio, you can go a whole month without seeing the sun. I have seen entire months of nothing but rain and drizzle with the temperatures hovering around the mid-40's. I guess that's why people up there flock to the Sunshine state, in order to get away from that.
Here, in the summer, it's months of nothing but sunny weather and blistering, brutal heat. Last summer, several days had highs around 110 degrees. Texas also had the worst drought in recorded history. The summer heat gets old real quickly. Everything is hot. Don't walk barefoot on sidewalks or concrete or you could burn the soles of your feet. The tap water is warm. The attic is hot to the point it's unhealthy. The air-conditioning can't sufficiently cool some rooms down. It takes a while for the a/c in the car to cool it down.This kind of heat could kill someone if they're not careful. It's not the hottest place around the country. Phoenix and Tuscon Arizona as well as Death Valley, California get those honors. I was in Phoenix, Arizona once when it got up to a high of 120 degrees. The only places around here that are truly cold in the summer are the dairy and produce coolers and freezer (which is more like a whole room) at the grocery store where I work. It doesn't cool off at night here in North Texas, either. The temperatures hover around the mid to high 90's in the evening and sometimes it doesn't 'cool' down to that until after 10 PM. When it gets to be August, or September, I get so sick and tired of seeing sunshine! It's like the opposite of Ohio where you get sick of cloudy, rainy weather. But still, the early Spring around here in North Texas sure is pretty.
I remember when Steve and I were in Ohio and dating, we would go to the Spring Garden Show at the Ohio State fairgrounds in March. There were a number of temporary but pretty gardens set up in a big, open building and it was refreshing to get away from all of the gray, bleak weather. I remember one little garden with bushes, flowers, trees, a little wooden bridge and a fountain with little lights scattered through the garden. It was beautiful. Then gradually as the years went by, the people that ran that show started setting up more advertising kiosks and fewer gardens until it became one big parade of ads, kiosks and people giving demonstrations on what they considered amazing new products trying to lure customers and make more money. Eventually, there were few or no gardens. That's when we stopped going to it. I don't think those who ran that show even had a clue that they were driving people away by making it one big advertising extravaganza. The gardens were selling stuff too, but it was pretty and pleasant rather than a stroll through a live version of the Home Shopping Network on steroids. People in places like Ohio need to see a little green after months of gray, cold, rainy weather. In Texas, we need a little cool, rainy weather after months and months of hot, sunny weather.
Here in North Texas, Spring comes much earlier and there are sunny days and sometimes warm days throughout the winter. The Heard has had pansies planted near the animal care cottage for most of the winter and they are beautiful. Winters around here aren't as bleak but the summers are. A friend of mine once said that the summers here are like the winters up north, you can't spend any time outside and nothing grows.
Down here in North Texas, the weather is really different from Ohio. I've seen it get up into the 70's in November and December. After growing up in Ohio, where it's cold from September through April and sometimes into May, it's weird to come down here to North Texas and hear lawnmowers in February. I remember one day here in November, it was in the 70's and the next day it dropped down to the 30's. The other day, my son was working outside at the Heard Museum and a cold front move in. He felt it drop 10 degrees in just a few minutes. There's a saying, "If you don't like the weather here, wait ten minutes and it will change." Of course that's said about many places, but it's really true here.
Most people get all excited about Spring and warm weather. I tend to get a little depressed in the Spring, especially when it starts to get hot. I read somewhere that people up north can get depressed in the Fall with the onset of winter, but people who live in warm climates can get depressed about the onset of summer heat. It's nice to work outside when it's 65 degrees or even 70, but I hate being outside in the 100 degree heat. Most people go from their air-conditioned house to their air-conditioned car to their air-conditioned offices with very limited walks from the car to a building. As long as all of the air-conditioning is working, every thing is cool, literally. It's just that when the a/c breaks down that it gets unpleasant, or if you have to be outside in the heat.
Right now, we just need to enjoy the benefits of early Spring, like all of the beautiful flowers.
It's hard to believe that it's now Spring Break and that Spring is almost here. Bradford Pears and Redbud trees are blooming. Hyacinths and Daffodils have been blooming. We've had a few bouts of 80 degree weather but over the weekend, we had a nice cool break from that. Monday, it got warm again. I think this past weekend was our last break before the weather starts getting hot. It will gradually get hotter as we move into April. Then it gets really humid around the end of May and in early June. After that, it dries up a bit and then the oven weather starts. I'm not saying that summers in Ohio are any picnic. There, it can be 99 degrees with 98 percent humidity and that can be as hot if not hotter than the 100-plus degree days we get here. In Ohio, the nights cool off, the humidity is still there, but the temperature starts to go down at night. In August, it really cools down at night. Still, I'm glad we don't get that kind of humidity here. I heard that in Houston, they do get that kind of humidity, along with Texas summer temperatures. I don't think I want to live in Houston.
So, I've spent this whole blog jabbering on about the weather and it's taken me several days to get it published. I just want to say that early Spring around here sure is pretty.
Here, in the summer, it's months of nothing but sunny weather and blistering, brutal heat. Last summer, several days had highs around 110 degrees. Texas also had the worst drought in recorded history. The summer heat gets old real quickly. Everything is hot. Don't walk barefoot on sidewalks or concrete or you could burn the soles of your feet. The tap water is warm. The attic is hot to the point it's unhealthy. The air-conditioning can't sufficiently cool some rooms down. It takes a while for the a/c in the car to cool it down.This kind of heat could kill someone if they're not careful. It's not the hottest place around the country. Phoenix and Tuscon Arizona as well as Death Valley, California get those honors. I was in Phoenix, Arizona once when it got up to a high of 120 degrees. The only places around here that are truly cold in the summer are the dairy and produce coolers and freezer (which is more like a whole room) at the grocery store where I work. It doesn't cool off at night here in North Texas, either. The temperatures hover around the mid to high 90's in the evening and sometimes it doesn't 'cool' down to that until after 10 PM. When it gets to be August, or September, I get so sick and tired of seeing sunshine! It's like the opposite of Ohio where you get sick of cloudy, rainy weather. But still, the early Spring around here in North Texas sure is pretty.
I remember when Steve and I were in Ohio and dating, we would go to the Spring Garden Show at the Ohio State fairgrounds in March. There were a number of temporary but pretty gardens set up in a big, open building and it was refreshing to get away from all of the gray, bleak weather. I remember one little garden with bushes, flowers, trees, a little wooden bridge and a fountain with little lights scattered through the garden. It was beautiful. Then gradually as the years went by, the people that ran that show started setting up more advertising kiosks and fewer gardens until it became one big parade of ads, kiosks and people giving demonstrations on what they considered amazing new products trying to lure customers and make more money. Eventually, there were few or no gardens. That's when we stopped going to it. I don't think those who ran that show even had a clue that they were driving people away by making it one big advertising extravaganza. The gardens were selling stuff too, but it was pretty and pleasant rather than a stroll through a live version of the Home Shopping Network on steroids. People in places like Ohio need to see a little green after months of gray, cold, rainy weather. In Texas, we need a little cool, rainy weather after months and months of hot, sunny weather.
Here in North Texas, Spring comes much earlier and there are sunny days and sometimes warm days throughout the winter. The Heard has had pansies planted near the animal care cottage for most of the winter and they are beautiful. Winters around here aren't as bleak but the summers are. A friend of mine once said that the summers here are like the winters up north, you can't spend any time outside and nothing grows.
Down here in North Texas, the weather is really different from Ohio. I've seen it get up into the 70's in November and December. After growing up in Ohio, where it's cold from September through April and sometimes into May, it's weird to come down here to North Texas and hear lawnmowers in February. I remember one day here in November, it was in the 70's and the next day it dropped down to the 30's. The other day, my son was working outside at the Heard Museum and a cold front move in. He felt it drop 10 degrees in just a few minutes. There's a saying, "If you don't like the weather here, wait ten minutes and it will change." Of course that's said about many places, but it's really true here.
Most people get all excited about Spring and warm weather. I tend to get a little depressed in the Spring, especially when it starts to get hot. I read somewhere that people up north can get depressed in the Fall with the onset of winter, but people who live in warm climates can get depressed about the onset of summer heat. It's nice to work outside when it's 65 degrees or even 70, but I hate being outside in the 100 degree heat. Most people go from their air-conditioned house to their air-conditioned car to their air-conditioned offices with very limited walks from the car to a building. As long as all of the air-conditioning is working, every thing is cool, literally. It's just that when the a/c breaks down that it gets unpleasant, or if you have to be outside in the heat.
Right now, we just need to enjoy the benefits of early Spring, like all of the beautiful flowers.
Bradford Pear Trees in Bloom
They're real pretty, but they don't hold up well, especially in storms.
Redbuds
One of my Hyacinths
It's hard to believe that it's now Spring Break and that Spring is almost here. Bradford Pears and Redbud trees are blooming. Hyacinths and Daffodils have been blooming. We've had a few bouts of 80 degree weather but over the weekend, we had a nice cool break from that. Monday, it got warm again. I think this past weekend was our last break before the weather starts getting hot. It will gradually get hotter as we move into April. Then it gets really humid around the end of May and in early June. After that, it dries up a bit and then the oven weather starts. I'm not saying that summers in Ohio are any picnic. There, it can be 99 degrees with 98 percent humidity and that can be as hot if not hotter than the 100-plus degree days we get here. In Ohio, the nights cool off, the humidity is still there, but the temperature starts to go down at night. In August, it really cools down at night. Still, I'm glad we don't get that kind of humidity here. I heard that in Houston, they do get that kind of humidity, along with Texas summer temperatures. I don't think I want to live in Houston.
So, I've spent this whole blog jabbering on about the weather and it's taken me several days to get it published. I just want to say that early Spring around here sure is pretty.
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Daylight Saving? Time
Arizona does not
use Daylight Saving Time. They get it, with the kind of heat they have, it
would just be ridiculous. I wish we wouldn't use it here in Texas. It
doesn't get quite as hot here, but it comes close. Last year, we had highs in
the summer of 110 degrees. It's getting more like Phoenix, Arizona.
Daylight Saving Time was apparently thought up by Benjamin
Franklin who thought it would save money on candles. That’s nice, back in the
1700’s, long, long ago in a galaxy far, far away. Well, actually northeast from
here, where it’s cooler in the summer and long before air-conditioning was even
a thought. The only burning of candles these days is for those setting a
certain mood or burning those scented candles that give me asthma. Daylight Saving Time was also supposed to
help farmers somehow, I think allowing them more daylight for harvesting crops
or something like that. Actually, I read that farmers or don't like Daylight Saving Time because they have to get up with the sun no matter what, but don't like screwing around with the clocks in order to sell their crops. Of course now, farms are huge corporations and I doubt if screwing around with the clocks matters to them one way or another.
According to standard time.com, Daylight Saving Time was used back in WWI to save fuel by using fewer electric lights. It wasn't observed again, with the exception of a few states, until WWII. In 1973, DST was used year round. Thank goodness that didn't work out! In my opinion, Daylight Saving Time was a concept thought up many years ago and the idea of it still exists, even though the actual reason for it has gone the way of the dinosaurs.
The article on standard time.com also stated that it is shown that there are more traffic accidents on the Monday after Daylight Saving Time kicks in because people are tired from losing that hour of sleep. Why is Daylight Saving Time a good thing? It's not.
According to standard time.com, Daylight Saving Time was used back in WWI to save fuel by using fewer electric lights. It wasn't observed again, with the exception of a few states, until WWII. In 1973, DST was used year round. Thank goodness that didn't work out! In my opinion, Daylight Saving Time was a concept thought up many years ago and the idea of it still exists, even though the actual reason for it has gone the way of the dinosaurs.
The article on standard time.com also stated that it is shown that there are more traffic accidents on the Monday after Daylight Saving Time kicks in because people are tired from losing that hour of sleep. Why is Daylight Saving Time a good thing? It's not.
One thing for sure, vampires would not like Daylight Saving Time, they don't want to save any daylight - ever! No, I'm not a vampire. I wonder if there was a Zombie Apocalypse, would that put an end to Daylight Saving Time? I mean like Zombies don't really care about saving daylight, they just want to eat brains, right?
Some people actually like Daylight Saving Time. Most of them live
up north, but there are a few that live in Texas. Some people are naturally
early morning people that actually enjoy getting up an hour earlier. This is a
life form that is unnatural and alien to me. My mother was a morning person, ‘bright-eye
and bushy-tailed’ at 5:30 AM every morning. I am her polar opposite. I am not and never
will be a morning person.Vampires aren't morning people either, but I am not a vampire.
One year, I had to go to work at the grocery store at 7AM on the
morning after the dreaded Daylight Saving Time got switched on. It was
technically 6 AM and I felt like it was more like 4AM. The first thing I had to
do was bring carts in from the lot. It’s a good thing there wasn’t much traffic
in the lot because my level of awareness was very low. I probably wouldn’t have
even noticed a semi at high speed right in front of me. After that, I had to go in and bag
groceries. Usually bagging groceries at that hour isn’t bad, people usually come in to
get just a few items like doughnuts and maybe some bacon and eggs. There are
those few who do their weekly or monthly grocery shopping at that hour. This
one lady rolled a cart up to the register I was at, (the only register that was
open at that time) with a mountainous pile of groceries in it that looked like
enough to feed an army of teenage boys for a month and a half. She was all
perky and must have been there since the store opened. I hate it when people
are perky early in the morning. I bagged her groceries in the manner that I was
supposed to; bagging groceries is something you can do at a lower level of
awareness and still do a good job. I don’t remember much after that, but in my
mind, I was questioning her sanity the whole time.
One year, my future husband and I were out on a date when I was
still living with my parents. It was the night that Daylight Saving Time was
to be switched on. I was an adult, but my parents still had strict rules about
what time they wanted me home and I was sick and tired of it. I was usually
home in plenty of time. My mother had an amazing imagination and if I hadn’t
come home when she wanted me to, at the exact second that I said I would or that she said I would, she would
imagine that I had suffered any number of horrible disasters she had seen on
the news. Well, that night, Steve and I were at the Ohio State area on High
Street. I remember we visited a night club and small concert area
called ‘The Agora.’ We were having a good time and figured since I was an
adult, it was okay. It wasn’t. Like I said earlier, it was the night Daylight
Saving Time happened, so I actually got in an hour later than I really got in,
if that makes any sense. When I got
home, I got chewed out by my mom big time. My dad went along with her. In the
days following, they kept reminding me of it, over and over again, as if I had committed a felony. They never let me forget about
it, even after Steve and I got married and moved to Texas. I don’t think my mom
ever forgot about it! Moving to Texas was a necessity in order to get a job,
but it was also a blessing because then my mom couldn't be like those guys' mom on 'Everybody Loves Raymond' with an attitude.
This weekend is the time for Daylight Saving Time to be switched
on. It is called ‘Spring Forward’ but I call it being
needlessly yanked forward an hour by an inane custom that’s over 100 years old
that has no reason for existing except that people are in the habit of doing it
and a few crazy morning people have the power to make it happen. No matter how much I rant and rave, it's not going to change, we're still going to be subjected to this nonsensical time change. I can write my congressman a request to help end Daylight Saving Time just like I do every year but the masses are entrenched in the habit of changing their clocks twice a year and it will take some sort of apocalypse to change that. I just need to look forward to 'Fall Back' when the timeline once again becomes normal and sane.
Check out this article:
Here's another article where I got my facts: http://www.standardtime.com/
Here's another article where I got my facts: http://www.standardtime.com/
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